I think summer time is my favorite time of the year. I have enjoyed the kids being out of school and our schedules are a little less hectic. It's nice to take a weekend getaway on a whim without having to worry about ball practices and dance recitals. It is the laid back life that I've always loved.. with that, comes laid back meal plans. There aren't "school nights" driving the family to eat at a specific hour so we can get homework done and get to bed at an early hour. Instead you're planning vacations! Weight loss, like vacations, takes much preparation and planning. While on your travels there are ups and downs. There are very exciting moments.. like the anticipation of what is to come and all the places you will visit. There are a few lulls.. like the car ride down a long highway with nothing but trees or open land to look at. There will be moments when you take a wrong turn and get lost and have to back track a couple of miles because you zigged when you should've zagged. It's no secret that I have been going through ups and downs.. some really exciting moments, a few lulls, and even a couple of detours. It's enough to make you CRAZY! In my previous posts you have seen where I have been analyzing myself and why I'm not losing like I did in the beginning. I've analyzed such factors like, adding more weight to my workouts, more cardio, changing my eating, plateaus.. you name it! I've given myself excuses as to why I'm not losing, vowing that I'll analyze that and change. I want nothing more than to reach my goal and lead a healthy happy lifestyle forever and ever amen. But it takes WORK! Constant work. Just when I think I have it all under control, I am quickly reminded that I'm not invincible. It's not an obsession, but it is something that HAS to stay at the forefront of your mind. It may not be a HUGE battle every second of the day to stay away from the junk.. but all it takes it a few compliments and a pat on the back for all of your hard work and you start to think that one day of cheating won't hurt you. Then before you know it, one day turns into a day and a half.. turns into Friday evening through Sunday at lunch and maybe dinner if you weren't TOO bad over the weekend. ;) Sound familiar? Yep.. it's the game. We all play the game. Well.. if this is a game.. I want to be the CHEERLEADER!
The Only Way to Not Go Back is to NOT GO BACK!
These are my mother's wise words. I don't ever intend on going back to the way I was before.. overweight, miserable, and unhappy. I have worked very hard and continue to work even harder. Maybe I'm too tough on myself, but I'm afraid to let up. It's not easy mentally or physically and I'm terrified to let it all go to waste. If i have a lax attitude, it'll be too easy get back into old habits. I'm not perfect and I will cheat, have emotional moments, have 'what the hell' moments, etc.. so by setting my expectations so high it gives me a little cushion before I get out of hand. So yeah.. I have my moments of letting loose and splurging (or over splurging in some cases) but I reign it in by being hard on me. Is this making ANY sense? Because it all does in my head. LOL! :D
The Devil Made Me Do It
Along with less hectic schedules and laid back meal plans, summer time brings back yard bbq's, gatherings, parties, and drinks on the patio. In the beginning, I had realized how many empty calories alcohol had and that I was really wasting my "Points" on such crap. I could handle a drink every now and then, but when I would go out and really party it up.. not only was I dealing with the empty calories and tons of sugar in the drinks, but I was also having to deal with the late night drive thru and let's not forget the day after. Who doesn't eat crap when you have a hangover. Jack in the Box has never tasted so good! I was so focused on the effects of one night of drinking that I had quit drinking so much so often (and no.. I don't have a drinking problem). Well.. since my favorite season has rolled back around and I'm gracing my presence at all these different social gatherings, I've let myself slip back into the drinking habit. It doesn't have to be every weekend, but just a night/weekend here, there, and everywhere really starts to add up. Over this past weekend there were two nights where I drank more than I should have and dealt with the day after effects. No fun I tell you. It effects my eating and my workouts. I am sabotaging myself. I'm fooling myself into thinking that just a "night out" won't hurt me. In reality, a night out won't hurt you.. it's the repeated nights out. That continuous accountability that I've talked about before really helps. I may be trying to fool myself.. but once you step on the scale there is no more fooling. Do you really know how fast junk and alcohol for a weekend can pack on the pounds? LOL! I mean.. really .. it's SICKENING! So who was I really fooling? LOL! NO ONE! I am ashamed to report that I packed on about 6 pounds over the weekend. I don't enjoy sharing that information, but it is what it is and I've always said that I would be accountable for my actions. Was this a vacation weekend? No. Was this a super exciting weekend that I'll never forget or regret? Umm.. newp. It was just another weekend with another gathering with some really great people. Was it worth the added weight and added work I'll have to do? Hell to tha NO! Damn you SATAN for putting that alcohol and hot links to my lips! BAH!
I have stepped back, looked at myself, analyzed, re-analysed.. and now I'm just going to humble myself, keep my head down and work hard. It is so hard to keep focus when life gets in the way.. but that's just another excuse.. and I'm FRESH OUT of excuses. I'm still not giving up on my goals. It may not happen in the time frame I've set for myself, but the point is to TRY and get there. So here I go.. one step at a time! ;)
P.S.
This blog and weight loss journey is brought to you by the Good Lord himself, because without Him there would be no weight loss journey. :)
